I finally decided to give duck hunting a try.  I was out all day, sitting in a blind, next to the water.  It was nearing dusk, before a single drake finally made an appearance, circled, and started the descent toward the water.  I fired the shotgun, saw a few feathers flying, so I knew  I had hit it, but he headed back upward, looking as though he would fly away.  I came out of the blind, and watched.  Not too far away, he stopped flapping his wings, and went into a dive.  I hit the clearing as quick as I could, and I saw it hit a barn roof, and bounce, and then fall to the ground.

   I walked into the yard, and reached down, and as I was standing back up, with duck in hand, I heard a voice saying, “Whatcha doin?”  I answered, as I located where the voice came from, “I’m just getting my duck.”  The farmer said, “That’s my duck.”  I responded, “I shot this duck from the blind, over there”, pointing to the pond.  “I watched him fall, and hit your roof, and finished right here”, pointing to the ground.  The farmer said, “You’re from the city, ain’t ya?”  When I said “yes”, he same right back with, “Here’s the thing. My roof, my land, my duck.”  I said, “You’re kidding, right?”

   He then said, “We can settle this ‘country’ style, if you wish to.”  I said, “How’s that?”  He said, “We take turns, kicking each other in the groin, and the last one standing gets the duck.”  I said, “Well, if that’s the only way……”  He said, “Good, I go first” and before I had a chance to do anything, POW! he’d already kicked me.  My body kind of went in ‘shock’ mode, I dropped to my knees, felt nausous, and God, it hurt!!!  In a few minutes, I finally gathered my wits, stood up, and said, “Well, I guess it’s my turn”, knowing that my kick wasn’t going to be much, but wasn’t allowing it to show, and the farmer said, “Aw, hell, just take the duck!”

  

Advertisements